Anal sex is considered to be the most taboo of sex acts, but it doesn’t have to be! This guide will give you some suggestions on how to broaden your sexual spectrum and bring you and your lover to new orgasmic heights.
Step 1You Cannot Convince Her To Try Something She Doesn’t Want To: Despite the title of this How-To, you absolutely, unequivocally cannot convince, cajole, persuade or threaten your partner into trying something they’re not willing to do. Without enthusiastic consent, you’re going to lose the potential activity, and most likely your girlfriend/wife. Always approach a topic with respect and sensitivity.
See also: How To Have Anal Sex For The First Time
Step 2Discuss, Communicate, and Plan: As I previously mentioned, sexual discussions should happen in a low-pressure setting, neither before nor after intercourse (when emotions and endorphins run high). Talk about what you’d like to try, and ask open-ended (no pun intended) questions. Ask her if anal is something she’d ever thought about trying, and if so if she’d be interested in experimenting with you. If she says no, don’t stress. One sex act shouldn’t be a relationship dealbreaker.
Step 3Start Off Slow: First, you want to make sure your partner is incredibly turned on and has had as many orgasms as she can. The more relaxed she is, the more patent (or open) her rectum will be. Begin by gently inserting a finger (and then another, once she’s comfortable) into her rectum, slowly easing it in and out, using a water-based lubricant.
VERY IMPORTANT: Lube, lube, and more lube! Avoid any anal lubes that include an analgesic, as that could cause tears in your lover’s rectum that they won’t feel until after. Contrary to popular opinion, anal DOES NOT have to be painful, if you ease into it. Remember: your partner is in charge of speed, position, and atmosphere, and you need to stop at the instant she says so. My lover likes to start on her back, with her legs up and a pillow under her hips. This is an excellent beginner’s position, and your ladyfriend will have access to play with herself using her fingers, or a toy (find something on www.AdamandEve.com!)
Step 4Shit Happens..But Not Really: One of the biggest anxieties about anal sex is the fear of feces getting everywhere. First: I’d like to direct you to the book “Everybody Poops”. Feces is a natural part of life and is not a big deal.
Usually, there is a very little mess in anal sex, but I suggest laying a towel underneath her body as a precaution. However, if your lover feels a lot of pressure, or there’s leakage as you withdraw, take a break and try it again another time. If you’re concerned about poop while you’re in the middle of a hot session of butt sex, you’re doing it wrong.
See also: How To Prepare for Anal Sex
Step 5Turnabutt Is Fair Play: So you just finished a wonderfully fulfilling anal sex session, and you’re laying there in blissful orgasm with your partner. Now she rolls over and says, “Next time, it’s YOUR turn.”
There are many ways to enjoy anal stimulation as a dude; your prostate is full of killer nerve endings that are designed to enhance orgasm. We suggest starting the same way as your partner: begin by easing a single digit in while taking a shower, and continue your anal education by investing in a beginner’s kit like My 1st Anal Explorer Kit, on sale at www.AdamandEve.com for $29.95. Use Offer Code HOWTOSEX at checkout and receive 50% off almost any single item, FREE shipping, 3 FREE DVDs, and a FREE mystery gift.
Sex is supposed to be fun and relaxed, so if at any time you (or your partner) feels stressed, uncomfortable, or shows signs of pain, stop and reassess. Also, laughter is the best stress reliever, so if you find you and/or your lover feeling anxious, pull out your dick and your best knock-knock joke: it works every time.